I have had a crappy few weeks and I have been relying on the Lord for His strength to get me through each day. I have been listening to Darlene Zschech and Hillsong Music every day now for the past few weeks. In the car, at home when it’s me and Haven before Micah gets home, at work. Anyway, I have been wanting the new one for a while now, and didn’t get it for Christmas, so went ahead and bought it for myself. It’s called God He Reigns. Every time I get a new one of these live worship albums, I say they are the best yet, and they truly are. Every one I get seems to minister to me right where I am at. I am learning more and more to worship IN and THROUGH my circumstances and not focus on the circumstance, but on the Lord. For whatever reason, He has chosen this and I am praying and getting in the Word, trying to see just how He wants to use me and glorify Himself through this process. Our third baby is with Him now, we found out this past Sunday and although, it hurts, I know that there is hope and I have the Lord, so that is everything that I need. He wants Himself glorified above all else, no matter what the desire of my heart is. Although I know He wants to give me those desires, but in His timing.
God has been so good to allow me to have my sweet Haven and I realize now just what a true miracle from Him she is. She prayed for me while I was waiting in the hospital Sunday for the lab results to tell me wether or not I was still pregnant.
When you lose something, you are always reminded of what you do have and how important that becomes and what a true miracle life is. We are still trying to process through and grieve, but each day is a new day and His mercies are new every morning. He gives us strength when we have none and it is made perfect in our weaknesses. We are going to be running some tests here in the next month to try and determine the reasoning behind having 3 miscarriages in a row, and I am just belieing that teh Lord will allow us to find something out. We aren’t going to give up on having another baby–just need strength in the losses and that we would be able to see clearly how He wants to glorify Himself through Micah and I to bring others to Him.
We love you Lord. Thank you for all you have done in our lives and for all you are going to do. We believe that You are who You say You are. You are going to do what You say You are going to do. I am who You say I am. I can do all things through You. Your Word is alive and living in me.
We trust and believe that You work all things together for YOUR good. Thank you Jesus for Your hope in me.
‘For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you Do not be afraid for I myself will help you your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel.’