We had a sweet time with family and friends yesterday to celebrate Harbin. He had strict instructions for no Chick Fil A cow….
I may be on my knees, but I am standing in Him and His Word. His promises never fail. He won’t leave or forsake us. He is who He says He is and He will do what He says He will do. May it start in my heart. Healing, revelation, restoration and redemption.
Today is a special day b.c my sweet baby boy was due on this day. This was his official due date. I will always remember these two days. Tomorrow, although I am blogging about it tonight, b.c I won’t be able to tomorrow, was when my second baby went to heaven. Somehow, no matter how long ago, a mommy always remembers dates. It was January 8th 2004. So long ago, but still so fresh in my mind. It’s amazing to think about being safe in Heaven with Jesus, yet we are also safe here, our earthly home, with Jesus.
Birthing means to: A beginning or commencement. I feel like the past few years have been that for me. Sometimes traumatic events lead you to that, normally not by your choosing. He gives and He takes away, but His name is to be called blessed. I won’t understand some things, but I will trust and know that He is and will continue to birth in me His purpose. And for my babies, the ones I’ve lost, and the ones here on earth that I get to show Jesus to, their hearts would be molded to Him. And when my heart literally beats out of my chest from hurt and pain and grief (and anxiety-who knew) then I will still trust and know that my heart is His. And He knows.
A reminder from You when I needed it most.
Today was the day I was scheduled to have you 3 years ago. You are so special for many reasons:
-you are the Lord’s
-you run up to me at random times and say ‘I lub you mommy’ just because.
-when you want me to pick you up or you want to be held, you say ‘i hold you’.
-when you are having a hard time getting to sleep at night, i ask what you need, it’s always ‘i just need you’.
-during intense parts of movies, or intense music, you put your hands on your ears or cover your eyes.
-when you hurt yourself you want me to kiss it and pray.
-you love reading each night, and praying with mommy and sissy
-you are asking so many questions about Jesus and where He is. and His angels that protect us.
-you love veggie tales and Bob the Builder
-your favorite song this year is: ‘A Bushel and a Peck’ by Junior Asparagus.
-you love your sissy and want to know where she is at all times. you have to give her a hug and a kiss before each nap and before bed.
There are so many things that make you who you are. You love learning, counting, spelling, and lining things up so they are organized.:) It has been a hard year for all of us, and you have made it so much more special b.c of who the Lord is making you to be. You are sensitive to Him and to others. You love deeply and feel sweetly. You haven’t been as sick this year as you have been the first two years, and we are continuing to believe that your bronchial asthma continues to lessen as you get older, but it’s still a struggle for you.
You are a cuddler and a hugger and you have blessed me and your sister beyond what you will ever know. And I know that others around you have also been blessed by your sweet spirit and your smile.
I pray you would continue to bring glory to your Heavenly Father, Jesus. He loves you more than any other.
I’m so proud of you.